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Everyone, everywhere should have a favorite book – something that inspires, comforts, entertains… something that lets us live outside ourselves if only within those pages!

my opening statement

This is not the first thing that I have written to you nor do I intend it will be the last.  Recently, one of my favorite authors posted a blog about his writing to his son, you can read it here, it prompted me to try and spend some more time doing the same.

The tricky part here is always how or where to begin.  So I think tonight I will start with my eldest.

I know that right now you think that I am mad or unhappy with you.  Untrue.  You think that I didn’t enjoy having you and Fia here this summer.  Also, untrue.  I love you and Fia with all my heart and loved having you here.  Part of me wants you here always so I can take care of you.  But another part of me knows that you need to do your own thing now.  I worry about you a lot.  I don’t think some of your choices are the best – but I am making that determination from afar and with limited reliable data.  I hope that you and Fia are thriving and happy.  I hope that someday soon you’ll feel like you can come see me.   You will always be my little girl… no matter what you do or who you are with (or what I think of them).  Just don’t let anyone marginalize you or mistreat you or treat you like less than the beautiful girl that you are.  Remember, Moms’ always love their daughters come hell or high water.

To my middle child… you have a frustrating sense of humor that I don’t always get and consequently I react in all the wrong ways.  You remind me so much of my Dad or my brothers in some of the things that you say – it really makes me laugh and smile.  You remind me of my Grandpa sometimes when I look at you.  You and your baby brother have that image in common.  Sometimes it makes me want to cry.  I think a lot now about you going off to college, because I know you are smart enough to do it.  I think how I just don’t know how I will do without you here.  I’ve never told you this because I guess it was something that I didn’t want to admit or maybe that I thought would show weakness where I couldn’t afford it or maybe people would view it as selfish or wrong somehow.  But the truth is that for the last 15 years you have been my rock… my sticking point… my inspiration.  When I felt things were at their absolute worst you always brought me back from the brink.   I’m sure you never realized it but you always grounded me.  Maybe because it was only you and me in a sense… your Dad was never there and so you were 100% mine from day one and you gave me the unconditional love that I needed to keep going and I never had to share it with anyone.  I’m not doing a very good job of putting it into words; just know that you are my light. I hope that when you are off making your way in the world you’ll think to call your Mom once in a while.  I love you, Austina-ballerina.  Now clean your room! (-;

Now we come to my second life and double-trouble.  There are 12 years between you two and your big brother, whew!  I had started writing a book of how you came to be and it is half finished somewhere here on my computer.  Today though, my twin-kies, you are just three years old.  You fill the halls with laughter and nonsense and everyone needs that in their life.  I learned a lot about parenting from your brother and sister but not nearly enough to claim I have a clue.  You both surprise me every single day with things you do or say.

My Monkey, you are the master mimic right now.  And no matter how many times you do it, I will always laugh when you ask me if I am ‘ready to arm’.  You are an unstoppable force and some days I worry that if you bump your head in the same place one more time you will have a permanent bruise!  You tried to take your Gramma out with a hot wheel this summer… you’re definitely a little firecracker!  You are loving and kind and full of hugs and kisses.  And not unlike your big brother, when you think you’ve hit on something that gets a laugh you tend to repeat it a lot.  You are my precious little man and I love you.

My Princess you are the queen bee of the hive around here and frequently run your big brother ragged.  The other day you wanted something and I said I didn’t have the money and you informed me it was in my purse.  When I said I didn’t have enough you said that we needed to get some more then.  When I asked you where, you said to look in my pockets!  You have a little head wag and attitude and that defies me and makes me worry about what kind of trouble I have to look forward to.  You are smart and talkative – I love the way that you make up little stories when you are playing with your ponies and buffalos and other dolls.  You play along with my silly jokes on your ‘stinky’ brothers which is great.  You are a beauty who will break a million hearts and I love you!

That’s all for tonight.  I will try to make a habit of this so all the unsaid things get said.

Why Austin will never give me grandkids…

I had started crocheting a baby blanket for my soon-to-be grand-baby.  (from Katey)

Austin laughs and says “Geez Mom, you’re in full-on Granny mode!”  (my Mom is constantly knitting, sewing, etc)

I respond with a sigh, “Maybe I’ll have it done by the time you have a baby.”  (as of this writing the baby better be extremely skinny)

To which he adamantly replies “I’m never having kids!”

And I say “Well… when your wife has a baby.”

Austin – “No way, Mom!  I’m not ever having kids!”

Me – “Why not?”  (and I was asking seriously)

Without so much as a word he rolls his eyes and then looks at me and then looks at the twins… “They’re why!!”

Of course… that should have been obvious, right?! LOL


Later that day while trying to relax and have a snack two mini-people (who had already eaten their dinner) attacked from both sides ‘meowing’ until I fed them.  I don’t believe that I have ever spoon fed the cat so I’m not sure why they thought that was a good idea.. but I suppose it resulted in them getting fed so I guess I’m the dope!






Happy Yule! Merry Christmas! Welcome New Year!

Happy Holidays and a Shiny New Year filled with lots of love and good cheer!

  • The Ninth Pãramitã:   Loving Kindness (mettã) means ‘good will’ in all our actions.
  • My religion is very simple.  My religion is kindness. ~ The 14th Dali Lama
  • Kindness is the light that dissolves all walls between souls, families, and nations. ~ Paramahansa Yogananda
  • You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • Is there any one maxim which ought to be acted upon throughout one’s whole life?  Surely the maxim of loving kindness is such. ~ Confucious

May your hearts and homes be filled with Loving Kindness now and always.

Love from Candi, Austin, Ellie, Marcus, Jose & Katey

This time of year it always seems we notice those missing from our lives a little bit more.  It seems harder to get on with the days without them here.  Hold your family close at the holidays and everyday… you just don’t know what’s around the corner.  So for all those faces & voices & hugs & kisses that will be missed at the table this Christmas – I still hold you all in my heart and miss you dearly.

Marcus 1 Ellie 0

So Marcus got the first point in the very amusing game of giving Mom heart-failure today.  We were at Menards looking for carpet and I had the twinnkies in one of those car-carts.  I had looked down at them thru the little back window and saw both their hats were gone so I started retracing my steps to find them.  After I found the 2nd hat I looked again and Marcus was gone!  Somehow he’d gotten out of the seatbelt & out of the car when I had stopped the cart.  I went into full-on panic mode.  I was running through the isles calling for him and practically tackled the first store person I saw who immediately got on his handset.  Thankfully he’d only gotten around the corner and an older female associate had captured him.  I think I snatched him out of her arms so fast she probably thought I was insane… and well maybe just then I was.  Needless to say he had to ride in the regular cart seat, tightly belted in, for the rest of the visit.

He also earned the first point in truly irritating his brother tonight.  When we got home I gave the babies their bath.  Once they were done they were running buck wild around the bathroom.  Marcus climbed back into the tub (empty now) and decided to do some business.  I scooped him up and got him cleaned up and diapered and had Austin watch Ellie.  Once I had Marcus squared away and was getting Ellie in her jammies I told Austin that since he had late homework again his new punishment was to clean up the mess his brother had made in the bathtub.  Then I told him that from now on anytime he had late homework he’d have to cleanup baby messes.  He thought that was a pretty good incentive to do his homework on time.

Marcus also had his early learning screening today.  Which I am happy to report came out far better than the initial one.  They are going to come back in January to check him again.  They think he should be talking more than he is.  I’m not sure I agree with their findings but it was tonnes better than what the doctor thought at the 18-month checkup.

So all my monkeys are in bed where they are supposed to be!  I am going to just veg out for a little bit because it just seems to have been an extremely long week and I am very glad the weekend is here.  Oh… I did get some carpet after all that!  We’ll see how that adventure goes tomorrow!

Happy Halloween!  Happy Samhain!  Happy All Hallow’s Eve! Happy Harvest!  Whatever your pleasure here’s to you!

Monday’s gone

Well it was a long weekend travelling and it was a long day as well.  Tomorrow is the open house for Austin’s new school.  He starts 8th grade on Wednesday.  It’s sometimes hard for me to believe.  It’s kind of crazy to me that the twins will turn 2 on April 14th and Katey will turn 18!  Where does the time go!?  It is early but I thik that I’m done for the day.  Until tomorrow…


(Thank gawd it’s Thursday Night) Which means tomorrow is Friday.  This week seems to have taken on an unnatural and tiring life of it’s own and I for one am looking forward to the weekend.

I think the house painting will be done tomorrow too — so that will be nice.  The painters are nice and all but I don’t like having people lurking around the house all day.  I was a little worried about my color choices at first but now that it’s more of a finished product I think I am happy with it.  I’m guessing that all of my neighbors with their drab light blue, tan, or brown perfect vinyl siding are probably cringing at the very sunny yellow paint job.  Oh well – too bad for them!

So the roof is done and the paint will be done.  They just need to finish the gutters, the broken window and the deck steps.  Everything should be in order for my Labor Day picnic.  Woohoo!

I got my newish 2010 Kia Sedona on Monday night.  A steal of a deal.  Still working on the the paperwork with the credit union.  I have to say I love my credit union – they let me get the car and they pay the dealer and I haven’t even signed loan papers yet!  They are awesome!

I did decide to turn the twinnies car seats around.  There were 3 requirements:

  • Over 22 pounds – CHECK
  • Over 1 year old – CHECK
  • Over 34 inches – FAIL — but all my kids are short, I’m short… I find this rule insulting!

Ellie and Marcus LOVE it!  They can see Mom & Dad in the front of the car, they can see out the windows and they have way more leg room!  I actually feel like the seats are locked in better than they were when they were rear-facing.  So, I think it’s all good!

Progressive is not awesome.  They are being dicks about paying my GAP policy.  So… guess what? (Chicken butt!) They are cancelled!  Switched my auto insurance to the same company doing my house insurance (Allstate).  Not really any cheaper but it’s the principal of the thing.  Too bad cause I really like Flo.

2 minutes to the new episode of Futurama – so that’s all for now folks!

2 weeks in

We have now been here for 2 weeks and I still don’t feel settled in. Still alot of unpacking to do. We did get the shelves up today so I’ve started unpacking books – but I didn’t get very far. I unpacked\put away the boxes that were in the bedroom.

I tried to move a bookshelf from the garage into the living room but it wasn’t meant to be. I got the stupid thing all the way upstairs and then tripped and fell. The bookshelf fell apart landing on my back and one of the shelves landed on my head. A nail cut my arm. I took a beating but the bookshelf definitely lost as it is now laying in peices outside. It scared the twins and they cried for 15 minutes- then I decided it was time to take a coffee break. So we went into town for coffee (and milk). That made everyone feel better.

Back at work for a week after being off a week. I think I’m mostly caught up. Much of my stuff right now is drawn out so that it’s hard to get behind on it but it’s sometimes easy to forget about it! I try to go down my list every Monday morning and Friday afternoon just to see where I’m at with everything. Seems to be a pretty good system for me and it keeps the boss happy so that’s what matters.

Austin starts summer school tomorrow and summer band practice next week. He said he’s nervous but I think it will good for him to meet some of his classmates in a more relaxed atmosphere. He’s taking Tae Kwon Do, Guitar, and a class called Castles & Catapults. It will also give him a chance to get to know the school he’ll be in come fall.

I’ve decided I don’t care for the arrangement of my desks and computers but I haven’t decided yet on a better way to put everything. Definitely a to-do on my very long list of things to get done this summer.

I found a neighbor kid with a riding mower to cut the lawn today too. That was a big bonus because I haven’t been able to find any cheap used mowers and Austin & Jonny were being lazy with the pushmower and weed whacker. Hopefully the lawn will be cut tomorrow — if it doesn’t rain again.

Speaking of rain, I’m happy to report that thus far I’ve found no leaks. Considering all the other repairs that need to be done this is a real win!

Anyhoo…. I still don’tthink I can go to sleep but that’s about all there is to say at the moment. Everyone is sleeping like little angel-butts. Wish I was!

Goodnight, world!